Saturday, October 14, 2023

I'm an American!

 [Author's note: this was a 15-minute sprint. I may rewrite it as I would like to lean into FDR's Four Freedoms.]

“You can’t do this to me! I have rights! I’m an American!”

“What’s that?”

“What’s what?”


“A citizen of the greatest nation on Earth! The Land of Liberty! The birthplace of democracy. An American dammit. How do you not know that?”

“We don’t know many things. Please tell us more.”

“No. First you tell me! Who the fuck are you and where the fuck am I?”

“We are visitors here and you are safe.”

“Bullshit. I can’t see a thing. I… I can’t feel a thing.”

“Correct - this is for your own safety.”

“Well, I don’t want to be safe - I want to be free. Fuck it - that’s what an American is - a free person.”

“Free in what way?”

“Free as in free! Hit the open road! Free to say whatever we want! Free parking!”

“With no obligations?”

“Fuck obligations!”

“Do you not have to eat? To shelter yourself?”

“Of course we do - nothing is guaranteed in life except death and taxes.”

“Ah, yes, death. And what of living and health?”

“What about it?”

“Does your freedom include the freedom from disease? Freedom from medical debt? Freedom from avoidable injury?”

“What are you implying? You some communist?”

“We avoid such labels.”

“Well, labels or not, you’re some nutjob commies. I’m an American and I demand to be released.”

“We’re very sorry, but we cannot do that.”

“How dare you! Let me out!”

“There’s no you to be let out. You’re not an American any longer. You’re not even human. You’re merely one more brain in our storage.”

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